WTF?!?! – Mystic Knights of Tir Na Nog

will
Will Blanton

This one was suggested by a friend of mine, and if memory serves me correctly his exact words were: “I’m here to refer you to the ultimate bullshit of the 90’s. Have you heard of this?” He shoots me a link to the Wikipedia page for Mystic Knights which I instantly cringed at the look of the logo itself. I understand that it was supposed to have a story based around Irish mythology, but I honestly don’t think that a 13 year old me would have given a damn about the mythology. With it being released close to the end of the season of “Power Rangers: In Space” and with 303 episodes in the can, how in the world can this be a failure enough for me to review? They changed up the thing I loved most out of the Power Rangers series.

The first episode starts with the crutch for me and Power Rangers/Sentai/Seban content in general: the acting. I couldn’t help but to laugh, not only at the voice that came out of the mouth of the lead character, Rohan, but the entire cast as it appears that every single actor in the show is coming across like a stoned Matthew McConaughey slapped on a Irish accent and auditioned for the role. Who played Rohan? Lochiann O’Meriain, and with a name like that I don’t even have to confirm that he’s legitimately Irish. They can fucking do 100% better than casting someone that sounded like he was American trying to force a Irish accent. With a few minor exceptions, the entire cast needed to be redone or had a new voice in post production. Oh, my friends, I’m not done yet.

The quest of acquiring their Mystic Knight armor expands over multiple episodes as Rohan took the first 3 episodes to find out about the quest, embark on said quest, and get his armor. It was so painful to watch the first 3 episodes. I don’t dare continue on to see when everyone else gets theirs. There was more action, story, and emotion in the first 3 episodes of Power Rangers than Mystic Knights. I would be super pissed looking back if the Rangers were no more because of this horrible casting, while the writing is less than desirable at the same fucking time. I mean for fucks sake, why is it that they have to go on an excursion to find 4 separate armor sets one at a fucking time?!?!

Oh! What about the fight scenes you say? They have got to be better than everything else in the show right? Wrong again as they provide computer generated bad guys, and green screen fight scenes so bad it makes Reboot look like Toy Story. I understand that in order to have a brand new vision you have to think about how to look new and fresh, but when something is akin to a fucking hand puppet it’s time to rethink your production values. The production notes say they filmed in Ireland. Then fucking make it look like Ireland! All of the castle shots in episode one should have been filmed inside a fucking castle, not a half assed, poorly produced set shot. If the Power Rangers production team can hide a duct taped Lord Zedd staff from me for 26 years, they can fucking think of something better than short cutting sets, and using technology that is more outdated than my fucking computer. Yes, Compy is very outdated. Don’t judge me, god damn it!

As much as I shit all over Mystic Knights, it was a good valid attempt on an original Saban property. I just feel like they really didn’t care. I honestly was unaware until I randomly got hits on Ebay for it, but Bandai America and McDonalds created and distributed the toys with there being a minimal reach in retail. Nothing stuck out in a good way, and if it looks like shit, and sounds like shit…STAY THE FUCK AWAY!!!

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